Romance isn’t just for Valentine’s Day. Couples tend to have all kinds of romantic ideas and gestures before marriage. But to keep a healthy marriage growing, your spouse needs to know and be reminded that you’d marry them all over again.
Real Romance is about the Every Day Gestures of Love
Real romance is doing little things that speak love to your honey. Simple. Practical. Yet meaningful.
Simple Gestures to Keep Romance Alive in Marriage
Find ways to speak love using your spouse’s love language.
How do you know what your spouse’s love language is?
Observe how they show love to others.
My love language is Acts of Service. I love to cook, practice hospitality and serve others. I feel loved by Dennis when he helps with kitchen and household duties.
Dennis’ love language is a combo of Physical Touch and Quality Time. He tells me when I watch a movie or TV program with him and hold his hand, he feels loved.
If you’re not sure what your spouse’s love language is, ask these questions:
- What do I do that speaks love to you?
- In what ways can I show you that I love you?
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I love you because…. journal
A growing marriage pushes us to learn new ways to keep it healthy.
The idea to keep a journal that we randomly pass to each other expressing “I love you because” has become our newest approach.
We think of the ways we love our spouse, but too often forget to say it. A notebook used to write the thought is a great way to express it — as you think it!
Sometimes the written entries may contain an apology—in those times you know you were wrong, but need time and space before you can say those seven words face-to-face. I was wrong; will you forgive me?
The notebook doesn’t have to be fancy. A simple spiral-bound composition book will do. We wanted ours to be durable, so we have one like this.
Writing in this notebook has replaced buying seasonal, birthday and anniversary cards. We choose to write our personal sentiments to each other within these pages. (A win for the planet and a win for keeping clutter under control.)
When we have written something, we place it in a designated place so the other will know “you’ve got mail!”
Small I’m thinking of you gifts.
Practicing romance doesn’t have to cost a lot. My man loves Milky Way candy bars. I found a large bag of them on clearance after Christmas and brought them home. This simple, low-cost gesture made his day.
As part of $5 Fridays, our Albertson’s grocery store offers a different floral arrangment each week. . Most Fridays, Dennis presents me with a $5 bouquet–and I love it.
Pray for your spouse
I keep a prayer journal with sections for every member of my family. Scriptures that I personalize, and pray for Dennis and our marriage consume most of it.
A wife’s prayers for her husband have a far greater effect on him than anyone else’s. The strength of a man and wife joined together in God’s sight is far greater than the sum of the strengths of the two individuals.
Daily blessing of scriptural encouragement
Add speaking a scriptural encouragement each day with prayer? This is romance at its finest, in my opinion. Regardless of your spouse’s love language, words of blessing and affirmation are always appreciated.
As I pray for Dennis, often a scripture will stand out in my daily Bible reading that I think will encourage him. I write it out and speak it to him as part of our morning ritual for a week.
Holy Spirit is creative and knows just what our spouse needs. It is up to us to ask for ways to bless and encourage.
A recent blessing I spoke was from Colossians 1:9: May you receive the perfect knowledge of God’s pleasure over your life, making you a reservoir of every kind of wisdom and spiritual understanding.
Romance can include the over-the-top wining and dining, but it’s the small gestures that keep the romantic fires burning in your marriage.
What small gestures of romance will you choose this week?
Communicate about the ways you would like to be romanced by your spouse.